A poem, written by low self-worth, shame, codependency, love addiction, poor boundaries, and anxious attachment (it was a collaborative effort).
Will you love me unconditionally if I always look the right way and say all the right things?
Will you love me unconditionally if I put you on a pedestal and worship the ground you walk on?
Will you love me unconditionally if I take the blame for everything and assume you can do no wrong?
Will you love me unconditionally if I shower you with love, gifts, praise, and affection?
Will you love me unconditionally if I give you your space and yield to your demands whenever they arise?
Will you love me unconditionally if I neglect my ideals and compromise my integrity just to be with you?
Will you love me unconditionally if I do everything in my worldly power to make you happy all of the time?
If I incrementally amputate all the parts of my soul that matter most as a sacrifice to the gods of love and connection, take full responsibility for your feelings, thoughts, and actions, and completely abandon myself in an effort to meet all of your wants and needs…
… then will you love me unconditionally?
Oof!! That’s a tough one to read 😢
Yuuup. So many of us learn early on that we have to earn love. We have to perform. We have to prove something. I.e. we are NOT lovable for just being exactly who we are. This one erroneous belief drives the whole world’s emotional economy. I wanted this piece to illustrate the oxymoronic absurdity of trading anything for unconditional love. It’s completely ridiculous… but we do it every day 🤷🏼♂️.
Ouch! Spot on there! I’m in the process of changing that pattern and learning to love myself today.
Yeah, this piece brings the “ouch” to center stage. Happy to hear that you’ve had enough ouch to fuel a change. I truly believe that every success in life begins with self-love. Keep at it, Mike!